Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Questions, Questions...

Terry had these up on her blog. I liked them. I took them. Is that wrong?

1)What's your opinion on sex without emotional commitment?

So many women want me for my body…who am I to deny them?

Okay you can stop laughing now. It wasn’t that funny.

I’ve never been a casual sex person. Have I fantasized about it? Not since my teens, probably. I’m much more into sex as a physical expression of love, rather than a standalone experience. However, it doesn’t offend me when others wish to engage in it. It just doesn’t really interest me.

2) Do you bite your toenails?
Why would I want to?

3) Are you a jealous person?
Sometimes. But I never act upon my jealousy. I just wait for it to leave.

4) What are you allergic to?
Insects and idiocy—especially of the right-wing sort.

5) What books, if any, have made you cry?
None that I can think of off the top of my head.

6) Does it get annoying when somebody says they'll call you, but doesn't?
Depends on what the call is about. If it’s something that will impact how I spend my time and I can’t move forward without the information, yeah, I’ll get slightly peeved.

7) What is your favorite ice cream flavor?
Ben & Jerry’s Cherry Garcia. Mmmmmmm…..

8) If someone you had no interest in dating expressed interest what would you say to them?
Expressed interest in what? Rock climbing? Herpetology? Philately?* Oh...me? I don’t know. It’s never happened. I’d probably go out with them just to see if there’s something there that I was missing. If there wasn’t I’d probably say thanks but no thanks.

9) What would you rather be doing right now?
Writing a killer script for a client. But it’s not coming right now…

10) What song lyrics, if any, are stuck in your head at the moment, if any?
I drink good coffee in the morning
Comes from a place that’s far away.

And when it’s done I feel like talking

Without you here there is less to say.

I don’t want you thinking I’m unhappy

But what is closer to the truth

Is if I live ‘til I was one hundred and two
I just don’t think I’ll ever get over you.

I’m no longer moved to drink strong whiskey
I shook the hand of time and I knew

That if I lived ‘til I could no longer climb my stairs

I just don’t think I’ll ever get over you.

Your face dances and it haunts me

Laughter still ringing in my ears
I still find pieces of your presence here

Even, even after all these years.

Don’t want you thinking I don’t get asked to dinner

‘Cause I’m here to say that I sometimes do.

Even though I may soon feel the touch of love

I just don’t think I’ll ever get over you.

And even if I live ‘til I was a hundred and two

I just don’t think I’ll ever get over you.

11) What did you dress up as for your first Halloween?
The first one I remember I was Top Cat.

12)What's your favorite TV show, now or in the past?
Taxi. Judd Hirsh. Danny DeVito. Andy Kauffman. Christopher Lloyd. And yes…Tony Danza. What’s not to love? My favorite episode is the one where the cabbies get Reverend Jim a job as a driver. They take him to the DMV for his test:

Jim (reading the form he’s filling out)
: Eyes…

Elaine: No, don’t put two!

Oh. They mean color, don’t they?

And when he’s taking the written part of the test:

Jim (loud whisper): Pssssttt... what does the yellow light mean?

Bobby: "Slow down."

Okay. What... does... the... yellow... light... mean?

"Slow down"!

Okay! Whaaaat... dooooeeees... theeeee... yeeeel-looowwww... (checks the test again) liiiiight... meeeeaaan?

13) Do you get along better with the same or opposite sex?
Same, I guess.

14) Can others make you cry easily?
No. And neither can I.

15) Who was the last person to piss you off?
Sunday afternoon, I was driving down one of the busier streets. Some schmuck on a mobile phone comes up from a side street (with a stop sign) and pulls out almost completely into the intersection before looking to see if there was anyone coming. Yeah. Me. I swerve around him and continue on. I don’t honk or cuss him out, just avoid him and continue. At the next stop light, he pulls up on my right, puts down his phone long enough to shout “You’re a lousy driver!” and then zooms off around the corner. Asshole.

16) Are you picky about spelling and grammar?
Yes. Very much so.

17) Do you pay attention to calories on the back of packages?
No, not really. I just try to eat sensibly-sized portions.

18) If you could be any type of fruit what would you be?
A tomato. Most people have me pegged as one thing, when I’m actually something else.

19) Were you a "planned" child?
My conception: probably not. My life, however, was. Unfortunately, I was not consulted in the planning. It’s been a rough fit.

20) How many pairs of shoes do you own?
I have my black sneakers (Which go so well with my white crew socks) and a pair of waterproof hiking boots. I might have a pair of dress shoes in a box somewhere.

21) How many hours of sleep do you need to function?

I get six. I want eight.

22) What is your favorite alcoholic drink?
Alexander Keith’s India Pale Ale.

23) When was the last time you saw a rainbow?
Mid August, driving across the state from my brother’s house. The last time I saw a double rainbow was July 4th, 2005.

24) Have you ever been attracted to someone physically unattractive?
Terry (from whom I took this here questionnaire) wrote: If I was attracted to them, then they weren't unattractive, now were they? At least, not to me. So how can I possibly answer this stupid question?
I can’t say it any better.

25) Would you ever date someone covered in tattoos?
If she’s head-to-toe ink, probably not. But then again, someone like that would most likely be uninterested in me, so it doesn’t matter.

26) Do you believe that the guy should pay on the first date?
I believe that the first date should be paid for by whomever does the asking.

27) Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos?


28) Which do you make: wishes or plans?
The short answer here would be plans. The long answer is a post unto itself, so I’ll save that ‘til later.

29) Can you speak any languages other than English?
I can now say ‘I am going downstairs’ in eight different languages, including Svenska (thanks Åsa!). Nine if you count English. In Spanish, I can also say “Mi fonografia es quebrada” (My record player is broken), “¡Que lasima! ¡Este es dos chicas en la cosina!” (What a pity! There are two women in the kitchen!), and “Me llamo Hootie, y estes son mi Blowfish” (My name is Hootie, and these are my Blowfish).

30) What is your favorite salad dressing?

Bleu Cheese.

31) Have you ever fooled around with someone and not remembered?


32) Have you ever dated one of your best friends?

My best friends are Phil and Rick. No.

33) Has anyone told you a secret this week?

No. Don't tell anyone about that, OK?

34) When was the last time someone hit on you?

I don’t know if I’ve ever been ‘hit on’

35) Have you ever given up using or doing something to benefit your health?

I gave up cigarettes June 1, 2005. (The original question was ‘Did you notice there was no question #11?’ There were also two other numbers missing in the questionnaire. I thought this was a really silly question, so I changed it. Deal.)

*...which will get you nowhere.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

nice answers... and not because you quoted one of mine!

i'm still snorting over your spanish phrases, hootie.

9:40 PM  
Blogger Guy Wonders said...

I remember Top Cat. . . . now we're both dating ourselves (in the non-biblical sense, of course).

7:59 PM  
Blogger Balloon Pirate said...

No, Guy, I am dating myself.

I open doors for me, I charm myself at dinner, I'm great with myself in bed, and I never make me sleep on the wet spot.


8:43 PM  
Blogger Guy Wonders said...

Generous, considerate and charming. . . .you are a lucky man, indeed. . . .

9:48 PM  

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