Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Aroo?

That's the sound of a confused yeti.

I on occasion resemble such a creature. Especially in the early eighties, when I had shoulder-length hair and a full beard and weighed about 260.

If something happened that I didn't understand, I would cock my head to one side and make that noise.

Aroo?

I made it this evening, driving STBEW home. I had a meeting tonight, and so she watched the kids. She watched them at my place, because she lives in an airless, cramped studio apartment that reeks of cigarette smoke.

As I was driving her to her place, we were listening to the Yankees/Red Sox game on the radio. I decided to drop a little trivia I had heard earlier in the game.

"Did you know that since 2003, the Yankees and Red Sox have played 39 games, and the Red Sox have won 20?"

Dear readers, what would your reaction to that question be? I'm guessing it would range from interest at the closeness of the contest, to disinterest.

STBEW's reaction? "I blame the terrorists."

Aroo?

The terrorists?

"Yes. Since 9-11, the Yankees have not won the World Series. The terrorists did this."

Aroo?

"And the Yankees won't win again-ever-until I can come up with a way to defeat them."

Aroo?

"Let me get this straight," I said. "The reason a baseball team in New York City hasn't won the World Series is because you can't figure out a way to stop the terrorists?"

"Well, you don't have a plan, so who else? I mean, the Red Sox is one thing, but--come on--the White Sox? It's the terrorists!"*

Yes, she's a pain in the ass. But sometimes I miss her.

Yeharr

*By the way, she also believes that if she and her sister both watch a Buffalo Bills game together, then the Bills will lose. Her sister, a lawyer for the county, believes this as well. Going 0-4 in Super Bowls can do strange things to you.

9 Comments:

Blogger Daniel Hoffmann-Gill said...

It's always the terrorists fault...

8:51 AM  
Blogger United We Lay said...

I have never understood the logic of sports people.

9:28 AM  
Blogger United We Lay said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

9:28 AM  
Blogger Heidi the Hick said...

Shoulder length hair and 260?

OOh stop teasin me!

ha ha!

10:07 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Damn..shes a trip the STBEW. I would never of reached that conclusion about the Yanks and I love baseball and politics :p

10:34 AM  
Blogger lilmammal said...

Why does it seem natural that you would look like a Yeti during at least one point in your life?

11:16 AM  
Blogger Madame X said...

Ahh yes the AROO of the wild Yeti!
Very similar to the RoOOOo? of the domestic Scooby!

9:00 AM  
Blogger Colleen said...

hmmmm. leaving the STBEW alone. she has enough problems. too easy.

now, on to the red sox. as a member of red sox nation (said with a boston accent of course) i must say that the reason why the sox and yankees have played so much and the sox have one 20 out of 39 is that the curse is broken. now that we won the world series, yankees mojo is gone. they're scared. they can't beat us, and it shows. and i'll be there screaming for the red sox when they play the braves next weekend!

yeah baby

9:00 AM  
Blogger Notsocranky Yankee said...

Uhhhhh, yaahhh...that's quite the logic. I'll also leave that terrorist theory alone. Well, wait, do the terrorists have any influence on the Red Sox pitching staff? They need some help. Go Red Sox!

7:59 AM  

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